The death of a
loved one is always a terrible thing
to endure; it can take you by
surprise and send you in to a
whirlwind of grief and emotion. But
making this terrible event even that
much more traumatic is the amount of
planning and activity that must
suddenly take place. Not only are
you in a fragile emotional state but
you must now coordinate a host of
events surrounding the funeral.
Funeral planning, however, while
heartbreaking, does not have to
compound your already heightened
levels of stress.
The nature of the
funeral is largely dependent on the
deceased’s culture and traditions
surrounding death. But, in the
United States, most funerals –
while personalized to the family’s
customs – follow much of the same
format. And following a format will
allow you to go step-by-step through
the planning process with as little
discomfort as possible.
First and foremost,
when it comes to funeral planning,
it is necessary to choose the venue
for the funeral. Luckily, this is
almost always done prior to death;
many towns frequent the same funeral
home or the deceased may have chosen
one during their lifetime. A
reputable funeral home will be able
to guide you through the funeral
arrangements with experience and
compassion. You may choose to have a
viewing and then a funeral mass at a
church; the involvement of religious
services is completely up to you as
you consider what the deceased would
have wanted. The funeral planning
really begins here as you work with
the funeral home to arrange services
- on their property or through a
religious organization - as well as
burial arrangements.
There are some
details involved with funeral
planning that generate the tone that
you wish for the services. You will
have the ability to choose flowers,
music, and a number of other details
that will help personalize the
service. The important thing to
remember is that you are honoring
the life of someone you love; try
during this very difficult time, to
reflect the personality of your
loved one through the funeral
services.
Of course, in some
cases, people will take their own
funeral planning into their hands
many, many years before their death.
Perhaps there are details that are
important to them and they wish to
be included in their funeral. This
may seem like a morbid process, but
it can be an exceedingly generous
gift to family members left behind;
it gives them the ability to simply
put into motion the decisions their
family member has already made.
Funeral planning –
while difficult and very sad – can
be done with strength and love as
you plan the final goodbye for your
loved one.
